Same sex marriages

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Curious Cat, Oct 25, 2006.

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  1. Curious Cat

    Curious Cat Mobile Deity Super Moderator

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    Since we have all these other controversial threads going-There was an article today about New jersey passing a law allowing same sex couples to have the same rights as traditional married couples. It didn't seem to go as far as condoning marriage.

    I know I'm probably a bit more liberal then most but could someone enlighten me why so many people are opposed to same sex marriages? I'm not gay but I don't understand how it hurts somebody for someone else to get legally married if they're the same sex. Why is it any different then a white man marrying a black women? It's not like anybody is forcing you to do something you don't want to do. To me, it's a victimless crime and shouldn't be a crime. Really, can someone tell me why it's so opposed, I just don't get it? There seems to be so many more important things to worry about then who's with who. Am I missing something? :confused:
     
  2. NetBrakr

    NetBrakr Gone With The Wind

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    What!?

    Jc
     
  3. dogbarber

    dogbarber No one in particular...

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    Controversial threads? Where? :)
     
  4. Curious Cat

    Curious Cat Mobile Deity Super Moderator

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    Actually I was going for why? :)
     
  5. Magellan

    Magellan Moderator of Ill repute Super Moderator

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    I would be happy with a some sex marriage. :eek:
     
  6. DJ Rome

    DJ Rome Tinkerer & Dealer

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    If only to take the seriousness from the interweb.
     
  7. AK47

    AK47 Professional Loiterer

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    Personally, I oppose gay marriage. However, I do beleive this should be a local issue and not a federal issue since federal is covering too broad of a public. I beleive that the individual communities should be able to choose whether or not same sex marriages can take place or not so that way, people as a whole do not feel like religious or personal beleifs are being forced into their acceptance. I also feel that there are better ways the government can spend the money they force me to give them than to host a bunch of fuss about menial subjects such as gay marriage when we have homelessness, wars and other issues of the sort.
     
  8. tanbam

    tanbam Mobile Deity

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    Whoah, this has the makings of a good thread!

    I think that you'll find hundreds of different personal reasons. This is one of the subjects that is safe for me to talk about with my boss -a pretty conservative guy- so I have heard some of his arguments supporting a ban on same-sex marriages. I don't think he really subscribes to any of them, but he hangs around in circles that are even more conservative than he is.

    I think one of the main reasons for a lot of people, whether they want to admit it or not, is that it makes them feel icky when they think about it. Of course, there are also a lot of people who would like it banned because it is a sin, but I think even they realize that it might be a bad idea to legislate sin.

    One of the more compelling reasons that I've heard is that the most stable family unit in which to raise kids is a man-woman married couple in which to start the foundation. Fundamentally, there would be more diversity in a household with a man and a woman present, and that might be healthier for a child's development. You know, a dad that might show you what a hammer is for; a mom that bakes you cookies. Wow, did I say that out loud? I don't know how important that is; I came from a single mom household, and even having another "mom" may have been a better situation than seeing no real adult relationships at all.

    Then there are people who hold the position that gay parents may have a better chance of having gay kids, but I don't know if that can be supported. All of the gay people that I know - and that's not a huge number to begin with - have had straight parents. I have some gay relatives, and there doesn't seem to be any heredity reason for it that I have been able to see in their cases.

    Other than reasons like that, I don't see how it is much different than interracial marriages were treated years ago.

    If you believe that most people who are gay were born that way, like I do, I feel for them regarding the legal discriminations that they live with. There are very few minorities that haven't had their rights brought up to par with all of the others. It's really unfair that someone may be in a relationship with someone for almost all of their lives and legally that relationship is worthless, yet some stupid couple that get hitched one night when they're both drunk in Vegas have all of the legal benefits. There's been a lot of exposure, though, for the last few years. I think that it will be a lot better, legally at least, in another decade or so.

    On the other hand, I have a little trouble trying to understand why a gay couple would want to get married, anyway. Marriage, for me at least, is really important in only two areas, in religion and legal matters. I haven't been able to rectify (from an athiest point of view) why a gay couple would want a "church" marriage, and if it was possible to have all of the legal benefits of a marriage in any type of commited relationship, to me that would solve the issue.
     
  9. Adama D. Brown

    Adama D. Brown Brighthand Reviewer

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    Come on, folks--isn't is obvious that allowing gay marriage would be hugely unfair to all of the straight people who have gotten married solely because it was something gay people couldn't do? :p

    Since we haven't had any actual gay folk chime in yet (that we know of) I'll relay what I know from various conversations (warning, gross oversimplifications approaching): some of them don't want it, either because they don't care about it, or because they feel (whether they know it or not) that having the same ability to marry as straight people somehow makes them less gay, and more mainstream. Some of them are fine with civil unions or whatever you want to call it--they just want the legal benefits. On the other hand, many are of the view that why should they settle for lesser status than the straight people? Besides which, many gay people have the same kind of cultural bent that makes even most non-religious straight people have a traditional wedding. And for that matter being gay doesn't preclude having a religious bent, either. Like the rest of us, the majority of gays share the same basic archetypal cultural imagery for what constitutes happiness, and "Just Married" sounds a lot better than "Just Civil Unioned."
     
  10. holvoetn

    holvoetn Still a moderator ...

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    Not really my cup of tea but I can understand gay people wanting to have the same rights as 'normal' folks.

    In Belgium this is legally arranged since some years, so they can get married like anyone else (correction, they can not for church :rolleyes: ). Currently government is working on the rules to have adoption arranged, especially for those cases where one of the parents starts a new marriage with someone of the same sex. After that the other cases will be handled as well.

    I know some gay-married people and to be honest, they are not that different from the rest. On the other hand, they are a lot more conscious about their choice to get married.
     
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